My posts here are always an extension of what I’m thinking and feeling at the time.. I’m not sure if what I’m writing here will land, however I’m writing it cause (for whatever reason) it feels like it needs to be said

Recently I had the privilege of hanging out with some women who left an impact on me (more than they’ll ever realise). and no, they weren’t people out the front, getting accolades. they were salt of the earth people, with no ‘agenda’

one of the women, is one of only 88 female shearers in Aussie, and another woman who’s a master at bushcraft

They left an impact on me far more than what they’ll ever realise. the fabric of their being was so damn honest

What came out their mouth was ACTUALLY what was in their heart. there was no pretense with either of them. no trying to one up the other person. no games or agendas

It was beautiful. they are beautiful

The people who I choose to have close, are the most reliable, direct, honest ‘say what you mean, mean what you say’ people you’ll ever meet

And so, when I’m around people who aren’t being that, it lands like a shock in my system. I can almost feel sick with it

I was in the spa recently and a group of coaches (yup, COACHES) were chatting away, and the energy of the conversation felt so off. there was what was coming out their mouth (it all sounded ‘love n light’), and then there was the energy underneath – competition, one upping each other, games, pretending

Energetically, it felt like a communal “who’s the bigger dog” complete with leg-cocking and linguistically pissing to claim territory

and the thing is, the thing that REALLY gets my goat with that kind of thing, is that there was no upfrontness that it was happening

I left the sauna feeling angry. I feel about in-genuineness, the same way that I feel about eating ‘tripe’. its gross and hard to stomach. and it feels even worse when its wrapped in personal developmental / spiritual terms and showcased with an audience in front of it

** if anyone even says “oh that’s for you to look at Kate”. you can go suck my nut (I learnt that brilliant saying from my daughter). YES, I have looked at it, and what its shown me is …. laser clarity in what I want and don’t want in my life
what I stand for, and what I’m not cool with

I can smell bullshit a mile away. even when its coated in sugary glaze, and weighed down with a bag of ‘cherries on top’

I can see and feel whats going on underneath for someone, and when whats coming out their mouth ain’t matching whats inside them. it feels extremely OFF

And, over the years I’ve become RUTHLESS with not playing with it. which at times means ‘walking away’, other times it means ‘not feeding it’, and when appropriate, it looks like ‘calling it directly’ (different situations call for different responses – and with ALL situations, I’m not available to become tangled in it)

Sometimes I can even shock myself with how immediately Ill cut ties, and leave situations. I’ve wondered for brief moments if I’m too fast to do this, and then I remember again, that its more than many women aren’t fast enough

its a damn beautiful thing to know who you are, what you’re about, and what you’ll tolerate and not

being simply unavailable to become tangled up in a web of ingenuinity (is that a word?) is an act of self fucking love

and Id rather be alone, with no followers, no audience and no friends, than play the bullshit game

I know that that’s actually not the ‘only other option’. I get that. AND I’m also prepared to risk it all. in fact, I think that it IS that willingness to risk it all, that’s had me be able to say what I truly think

Cause when we’re holding onto people liking us, and seeing us a certain way, and only being seen in a glorified light… that right there, is the setup for disaster. it opens the door for BS, pretense, games, ingenuinity as well as holding back, and inconsistency

It squeezes out the magic of whats ACTUALLY inside of you
And it is that very magic (the one that is scary to express), that IS your special sauce

Cause honestly, TRULY being all of who you are, does require willingness, to “RISK IT ALL”

There’s no amount of money, audience size, or any reward that will have me being differently about this

I’d usually make some neat summary point at the end. today I’m not going to. I don’t feel like it

But I will say this. Holy crap I love this photo

Five minutes before this photo was taken, the photographer had me walking next to the swimming pool, gazing pensively off into the distance

My inner self was screaming at me “WHAT THE FUCCKK”
This feels sooooo not ‘you’

And so I said to the photographer (who was super awesome by the way, and loved the feedback) that I wasn’t into this type of photo / posing

And so in that energy, I sat down, and made a gesture to the things that over the years I’d done and not felt aligned with. It was a salute of acknowledgement to who I chose to know myself as…..

And then he snapped this shot
And it’s one of my favourites

For years I rejected my ‘grunginess’. thinking that it wasn’t welcome at the table. well, it is. its VERY welcome

My grunginess IS a part of my magic. She’s like the power-pack to my leadership that when tapped into, she supercharges everything

She’s the Chinese five spice in my special sauce. my sauce would be boring and bland if I didn’t allow my grunginess through

And, funnily enough, Shes the one who provides my BS radar – the one who lets me know when things feel off, and when they feel great. Thank God I’ve come to love Her and give her a place at the table. I couldn’t imagine doing life without Her

PS – I’m doing a one day VIP leadership day on the Gold Coast on 12th February. There’s 10 places left (it’s small and intimate where you’ll be activating ALL of what brings your power through). PM me for details

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